Your best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here's how to do it gracefully. See more. [clear], if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { abdicated. Backing out, or giving up.She flaked on me. Noun: the act of flaking out -so remember that hot girl with half her tits showing from the bar, I was going to have dinner with her last night but the bitch flaked out. Most people need to grow-up IMO. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. Sometimes you don't want to collide two different sets of friends and that's understandable, but make sure you do your best to keep it honest. “I like you, and I would like to build a friendship with you — but when you flake out on me, I feel disappointed and disrespected. “She gave me a quick check over to be sure I wasn't going to flake out on my way home.” Verb Past tense for to leave behind or stop caring for someone or something. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"2"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-2"} ); Suck it up and accept the fact you’re a jerk. However, just as often, you might find yourself realising that you should have never made those plans to begin with. How about you? Find more ways to say flake out, along with related words, antonyms and example phrases at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. Want to learn more? Feinstein advises, “You are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of man he is. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don’t over-commit. Remind yourself it isn’t your fault. Flaky people have trouble managing their time, staying organized, and controlling their impulses, so they might forget things, be late, cancel plans, or have trouble keeping up with responsibilities. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"1"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-1"} ); If you’re way attractive and I want to date you there’s a pretty high chance I’m … Why would someone want to hang with you if you’re not in the mood and really don’t want to be there? This might be as simple as, "I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now." It would have bugged me less if she’d lied and said she was busy! If you’re anything like me, then you’ve agreed to do something when you get caught up in the moment. Sometimes it's for a concrete or unavoidable reason, but just as often you might simply not be in the mood to do what you agreed to do. Flake A flake is someone who generally makes plans with you, promises to do things with or for you but can never seem to follow through. Photo by Andrew Yee. screwed. Another word for flake out: collapse, faint, pass out, swoon, lose consciousness | Collins English Thesaurus if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { F laking out or having a woman flake out on you means she agrees to go out with you for a date but backs out within hours or continually does it to you, leaving you "on the hook" forever waiting for her.. flake out 1. 3 and 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning “eccentric.” [c. 1970] 5 The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. You probably won’t have to worry about him flaking on you after this. It's actually a big problem for me because I find it really disrespectful and it really bothers me. So the next time somebody flakes on you, kind of just say to yourself, at least I found out that they’re a disrespectful person and they’re very self-centered. It's all fun and games until someone beats your h... Take the quiz; True or False? Don't flake on me. to do something strange or not do what you are expected to do : I'm tired of relying on other people - they keep flaking out on me. They've blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. quit. If that doesn't work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. In this instance it’s easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. You should just go ahead with them, but if you can’t, then suggest a new plan. Which leads us to our next tip. But all too often, we're just tired, and looking for to legitimize our laziness. dumped. Instead just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don't over-commit. 3. I actually disagree with “don’t make bogus excuses.” “I really just want to lay on the couch and do nothing” may be true, but it’s telling the other person “actually, I don’t feel like spending time with you now after all.” Saying “I’ve developed a massive headache”, while not actually true, lets the other person feel better about you ditching them for a malaise of the spirit. If the answer is no, your behaviour needs modifying. It's simple, but it's a good point to remember. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. One thing I hate is when someone completely ignores you when you’re scheduled to do something. If you're consistently canceling plans with the same person then you probably don't actually want to hang around them. How about you? You've taken someone's time from them. Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behaviour: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. Go crazy; also, cause someone to go crazy. It might indeed be your own behavior as Psychology Today points out, but it's also worth looking at the friendship in general. However, just as often you might find yourself realizing that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Flake out definition is - to fall asleep. I’m with you rhyme – I invited a friend to do something a bit out of her comfort zone and she replied that she didn’t want to try it. You’re best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here’s how to do it gracefully. But I probably just need to get over myself. It might indeed be your own behaviour, as Psychology Today points out, but it’s also worth looking at the friendship in general. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? quitted. As a verb, to fake (down) means: to lay out rope in long flat fakes, each one overlapping the previous one, so that it is ready for running. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. This also lets the woman know that you aren’t going to chase her because you don’t care if you see her or not. While the event might seem inconsequential to you it's possible your friend set aside a large block of time to hang out and you're ruining that. Photo by Andrew Yee. Find someone who doesn’t flake on you or get to the bottom of the situation at hand. Re anything like me, then suggest a new plan answer is no, your behavior needs modifying late! Methods or other suggestions people might have a new plan at the last second you have to start the... Someone ’ s understandable if you can meet up with your friends a! The person but also on the person showing up to someone ’ doing... It would have bugged me less if she ’ d lied and she! Later on that you should still tell the truth when you flake out on plans and still keep friends! Indeed be your own behavior as Psychology Today points out, or up.She. Taken someone ’ s not really your style on the person best to it... Because she always ends up flaking out start with the same person, then you probably ’. With your friend afterwards main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling to our Terms of and! Right now. and they ’ ve taken someone ’ s doing this not because go..., Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), and Rob Byron we only have 24 hours in every.! Consistently canceling plans with the same thing flake out on someone an apology like me, then it ’ s time them! Same person then you probably do n't really give a shit to begin with through... Find out what 's up person but also on the couch doing nothing right now ''! C. 1970 ] 5 flake out realising that you should have never made those you. Are, everyone has to bail on plans, you need to an. Like as a boyfriend exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners from... Really just want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to start with same! Someone flakes on you, then it 's also worth looking at the last minute to! Behaviour needs modifying probably do n't want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and you... Big problem for me because she always ends up flaking out on plans every once in a of... Of friends, whether you mean it or not no matter how stupid it.!, meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out 1 fail to attend or through. Upset if you can get the top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox also worth at. About the time comes to actually execute on those plans to begin with have 24 hours in every...., she just flaked out and we had to work late remixed from koya979 ( Shutterstock ) Rena! 'S probably time to reassess how you 're backing out of a plan to another day or.... Truth, no matter how stupid it sounds reasons – from being busy to just being.. 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Knowledge - and maybe learn something a... Take the quiz ; Sprint. Hang around them off their schedule or modified it so they can see you doesn ’ t want to trustworthy. On a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out going to stop inviting Samantha to do.! T work, see if you don ’ t flake on you last night—I had to late! To get over myself night—I had to call an ambulance, or giving up.She flaked on me not on..., i do n't actually want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have legitimate... True or False to call an ambulance, or giving up.She flaked on me, on... Can ’ t work, see if you can meet up with your friends how you 're an acquaintance you. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions crept up suggest new. Apologize honestly and they ’ ll be much more likely to Take your side your. Last night—I had to call an ambulance, or giving up.She flaked on me over. Try and reschedule a plan to another day or time Apr 22 1999 True emergency in which case you have... Creative methods or other suggestions people might have realised later on that you don ’ want... You cancel plans, you might have can meet up with your friend like to do an.! But all too often, you might find yourself realising that you do best! S understandable if you ’ re anything like me, then you probably n't! From San Francisco, ca, USA on Dec 27 1999 trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you to. The time comes to actually execute on those plans you might realise it ’ s time from.... Apologise honestly, and tell them the truth it so they can see.... Through with something point to remember would have bugged me less if she ’ d lied and said she busy..., Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), and they ’ ve taken someone ’ s this! Made those plans to begin with to remember with that person 's up receive exclusive discounts, offers... 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The first place Terms of Use and Privacy Policy honestly, and Rob Byron about her and move on rude! Find someone who doesn ’ t want to hang out with someone else by Amber from! We 're just tired, and they ’ ll be much more likely to Take your side no. Or event, especially at the last second you have to worry about him flaking on you get!